As we celebrate International Women’s Day, I would like to address a topic that affects all women, “Self-Care.” Something we all struggle with. We have been trained not to prioritize our self- care as a badge of honor. For generations, women have been mistreated by society in various forms. We have always fought for our rights to vote, work, have increased pay, and the list goes on.
A woman who can take care of herself without the assistance of a man is still a threat to society. If she chooses to be in the workplace or run her own business, this is seen as a form of sabotage to her home and she most times carries the guilt of not being all things to her children and partner. Historically, we have been taught that a woman’s role was to wash, cook, clean for her family, and raise her children. While that role has been redefined by many women who are business owners, executives, and working professionals, the burden of the definition of a real woman usually reverts to society’s original definition of her role.
The pain and complexity of our role as women and how society treats us has led us to mistreat ourselves. We have taken on this burden of the right of suffrage that has led universally to our neglect of self.
As I reflect on the significance of what this day represents, I urge all women to review their own self-care. Oxford Dictionary defines self-care as “the practice of taking an active role in protecting one’s own well-being and happiness, in particular during a period of stress.” For us to experience a happy, balanced life as women, we have to become very comfortable with the word no and choose ourselves above all else at times.
It took me many years to finally accept that my happiness is just as important as that of my children. I had to retrain my brain to become very comfortable with “me time” and fun and make this a priority. This form of self-care made me a better person, wife, and mother. I am ok with the fact that as a professional, I can’t cook a meal every day for my family. I am also grateful for a husband who understands that and respects and supports the fact that I am also happy being a working mom and wife. It took me a minute, but I am also ok with not getting an “A” in every area of my life. It is more important to me to get an A for my level of happiness and mental health. “If it is not making me happy, it’s not making sense.”
If our daily existence involves only taking care of others and neglecting ourselves, then there is a deeper issue than we are willing to admit. Studies show that people who have a high level of self love, have very little issues with self-care.
Catherine Beard lists the 7 pillars of Self-Care as:
Mental
Emotional
Physical
Environmental
Spiritual
Recreational
Social
We need to ensure that we eat properly, get sufficient sleep, exercise regularly, and maintain good hygiene. Socializing with friends and family, engaging in a hobby, finding our purpose, and being more grounded in life are equally important as well.
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References:
The 7 Pillars of Self Care and How to use Them by Catherine Beard – https://theblissfulmind.com/pillars-of-self-care/